Bible Study with the Cincotti’s – Offenses Must Come II – 11/09/2025
Today’s Bible Study, Authored by Arthur Cincotti.
Listen to our Bible Study Discussion at: Offenses Must Come II Audio Podcast
Or watch the Video Zoom Session of our Study on YouTube:
Here’s a throwback episode of Part 1 of Offenses Must Come:
Offense Must Come
“A brother offended is harder to win than a strong city,
And contentions are like the bars of a castle. Prov. 18:19
We are not unaware of Satan’s schemes. He is determined to undermine and destroy the goodness of God’s design and intent for mankind. In this dispensation of fallenness opportunities for offenses are everywhere. We could broadly say that an offense is at to root of every relationship issue. Eve was offended at the thought that God was withholding something from her; a seed planted by Satan. Cain was offended by his brother Abel and God’s regard for his sacrifice. King Saul was offended by the song, “Saul has killed his thousand, and David his ten thousand!” (I Sam. 18:7) and therefore was offended by David. Jesus was an offense to the religious leaders. In Mt. 15:12, His disciples came and said to Him, “Do You know that the Pharisees were offended when they heard this saying?” Even the people of His hometown were offended by Him (Mk. 6.3) In fact, Jesus actually had to go so far as to say, “blessed is the man who is not offended because of Me.” Lk. 7:23
Offenses cause a breach and separation in relationships. It could be a word or an action that misrepresents often with the intent to cause harm. The word in Greek is “Skandialon” with definitions that include “snare” and “stumbling block.” It has been taught in some circles that “skandialon” means, “the bait”, suggesting that if the injured party refuses to take “the bait” then the offense is defused. Sometimes it’s not as simple as that.
How shall we respond to offenses? Jesus said, “Woe to the world because of offenses! For offenses must come, but woe to that man by whom the offense comes!” Mt. 18:7. This is a weighty indictment. He goes on to say, in the Luke account, “it would be better for him if a millstone were hung around his neck and he were drowned in the depth of the sea.”
First we must separate two groups of people; believers and unbelievers. I say this because the gospel is an offense to unbelievers. Paul says, “For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God.” I Co. 1:18. In Gal. 5:11 he says, “why do I still suffer persecution? The offense of the cross has ceased.” Sometimes just our being in the room, or at the meeting is offensive; we don’t even need to say anything. The presence of God, which we bear is an offense to an unbelieving and dying world. In Rev. 6:16 they say, “mountains and rocks, ‘Fall on us and hide us from the face of Him who sits on the throne and from the wrath of the Lamb!”
Offenses that require greater attention for believers are those offenses that happen between believers. These offenses are damaging to our testimony and misrepresent the kingdom. Since this is such a big problem, God’s word has much to say in the way of instruction. It is God’s intent that we would be reconciled to Him and to one another.
Let’s look first at our reconciliation with God. We know that we are reconciled to God through the sacrificial death of Jesus Christ on the cross. II Cor. 5:19, “that is, that God was in Christ reconciling the world to Himself, not imputing their trespasses to them…” Though we are saved by grace through faith, and not of yourselves (Eph. 2:8) it still requires an agreement on our part. Otherwise the cross is wrongly considered to bring universal salvation. The potential for universal salvation resides in the sacrifice, but one must yet, “call upon the name of the Lord” to be saved. This suggests that there is a reciprocal action. Jesus is calling us and we have opportunity to respond. We actually have the capacity to reject His free gift and invitation which more than suggests the need to received it.
This pattern for reconciliation with God should be evident between Christlike believers. First, Jesus humbled Himself.
Ph. 2:5-8, “Let this mind be in you which was also in Christ Jesus, who, being in the form of God, did not consider it robbery to be equal with God, but made Himself of no reputation, taking the form of a bondservant, and coming in the likeness of men. And being found in appearance as a man, He humbled Himself and became obedient to the point of death, even the death of the cross.”
Humility is at the core of reconciliation. Humility in Jesus case was the willingness to receive an undeserved punishment. In our case it is the willingness to consider and even admit that we may have instigated or played a part in some way with the offense.
Next, with Jesus, His motivation was love. “for the joy that was set before Him (He) endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.” Heb. 12:2
The joy that was set before Him was the rescue of those who He loves. Imagine if this was the motivation behind our determination to reconcile offenses. Jesus said, “By this all will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another.” Jn. 13:35.
Can love persist where there is no reconciliation? In some cases, I believe yes. God still loves sinners but can have no fellowship with them apart from the shed blood covering of Christ.
The Scriptures give us methods to pursue reconciliation.
Mt. 18:15-17 is an example, “Moreover if your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault between you and him alone. If he hears you, you have gained your brother. But if he will not hear, take with you one or two more, that by the mouth of two or three witnesses every word my be established. And if he refuses to hear them, tell it to the church. But if he refuses even to hear the church, let him be to you like a heathen and a tax collector.” Incidentally, we are called to love heathen and tax collectors. The aim is always to pass through forgiveness – for which we are commanded – to repentance and reconciliation.
In Gal. 2:11 Paul tells of an incident he had with Peter: “Now when Peter had come to Antioch, I withstood him to he face, because he was to be blamed.” Paul confronted Peter for offending both him, and the Gentile believers who were present at their gathering. We are seeing that confrontation is a necessary part of reconciliation. It wouldn’t be righteous to allow a brother or sister to sin with impunity. We should, however, be cautious, prayerful, and circumspect about this, otherwise we may bring about a greater offense.
Since, as we have seen, it is necessary for this process to be reciprocal, there remains the possibility that reconciliation is not immediately manifest. In cases where trust is breached, it will take time to restore that. It is important to point out that, in these cases, love, forgiveness, and the hope of a restored friendship must never be withheld or abandoned. It should become our vigilant prayer focus for the restoration of such relationships that God may be glorified and that there would be no schisms in the body of Christ. Paul says, “Is Christ divided?” I Cor. 1:13. It was a rhetorical question, because Jesus said, “Every kingdom divided against itself is brought to desolation, and a house divided against a house falls.” Lk. 11:17
Finally, Jesus said, “Therefore if you brig your gift to the altar, and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar, and go your way, first be reconciled to you brother, and then come and offer you gift.”
Mt. 5:23-24. Imagine if we actually did this. What an impact a presently anemic church would make on the world around us.
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